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Writer's pictureSean Tendies

Bro Code: Series 1


jeering at bro

photo credit: girlschase.com


DOES BRO CODE EXIST?🤼‍♂️🤔


Is "Bro Code" a myth, a Machismo Relic, or a Guideline for Neurodivergent Adults?

The so-called "Bro Code" — a set of unwritten rules among men — is often portrayed as a bastion of loyalty, camaraderie, and respect among male friends. But does it really exist, and if so, how does it hold up under the scrutiny of neurodivergent adults, especially those with ASD, ADHD, or other autism traits?


First, let’s address the elephant in the room: the "Bro Code" is a relic of hyper-masculine culture, a simplistic distillation of male bonding that prioritizes shallow loyalty over genuine empathy and understanding. It mandates absurd rules like never stealing your mates’ missus or always having a buddy’s back in a fight, often without considering the complexities of individual circumstances or feelings.


For neurodivergent adults, these so-called rules can be especially problematic. Many people with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) or ADHD struggle with social norms and unspoken agreements. The "Bro Code," with its vague and context-dependent nature, can become an overwhelming and confusing labyrinth. It presumes an innate understanding of social cues and expectations that neurodivergent individuals might not inherently grasp or find important.


Moreover, the "Bro Code" often discourages open communication, which is crucial for neurodivergent individuals who thrive on clarity and directness. This lack of explicit communication can lead to misunderstandings and feelings of isolation among those who already feel marginalized by conventional social structures.


On the flip side, some neurodivergent adults might find a version of the "Bro Code" helpful, albeit not the traditional one. Clear, agreed-upon guidelines among friends can provide a framework that makes social interactions more manageable. For example, explicitly stating boundaries and expectations in friendships can alleviate anxiety and create a sense of security.


However, it’s essential to tailor these guidelines to respect individual differences and needs rather than enforcing a one-size-fits-all code. Instead of adhering to outdated macho norms, why not cultivate a "Code of Respect" that emphasizes mutual understanding, clear communication, and personalized support?


In essence, the traditional "Bro Code" is largely an outdated myth, unsuited for the nuanced realities of neurodivergent adults. It’s time to dismantle these archaic notions and build new frameworks that prioritize genuine connection over superficial loyalty. For neurodivergent individuals, this means fostering relationships where direct communication and mutual respect replace the tired tropes of machismo. Only then can we hope to create a truly inclusive and understanding social landscape.

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